Sometimes you’ll see a car for sale and it will literally take your breath away with its aching beauty or rarity or just how the whole price-to-car ratio just makes it such a stunning deal. This is one of those cases. This is one of those times when a car that should be the literal dictionary entry for boring – a 1996 Toyota Camry – somehow exceeds all possible expectations and becomes something far, far beyond what you ever thought it could be. This car is available in Sydney, Australia, for the minuscule sum of $845 Australian dollerydoos, or a mere $574.40 in American Screaming Eagle dollars. As you can see by these pictures, this car has been improved not by something added to it, but by a brilliant act of editing.

Look at this thing! It’s been bisected right at the B-pillar, and all that cumbersome bullshit that we call a “back half of the car” has been wisely replaced with some square-section steel tubing mounting what looks like a colossal shopping cart wheel. I think it pivots, like a caster?

There’s also a pair of angled braces, because this is not some hack job, and what looks kind of like a drink cooler that has been re-purposed into a fuel tank? Is that right? That’s brilliant, as it will keep your hot gas hot and you cold gas cold.

There’s not a whole lot of other information in the add – not that any rational person needs any more information – save for the mileage (quite low, for a Camry!) and that it’s an automatic (oh well, nothing is perfect) and then the one bit of absolute deep-fried, cheese-slathered gold that is the Seller’s Description:

Not only do I have no notes here, I have nothing but boundless respect for these absolutely glorious five words, which, together, should receive the Nobel Prize for Understatement or Chemistry, whichever gives the bigger prize.

Just imagine what owning this thing would be like! If that rear wheel pivots, what must this be like to whip around! Think about the tightness of the donuts you could do! Think how maneuverable this thing would be! It’d be like driving a fast forklift, kind of?

Plus, even better, the looks on the faces of the people you encounter with this car, after you tell them you just drive an old Camry, have to be absolutely priceless. Imagine picking up someone on a first date in this thing, after telling them to keep an eye out for the silver Toyota Camry approaching them. That pause as their mind tries to process exactly what the hell it is they’re looking at, before tentatively opening the door and sitting down, a mix of excitement and fear and confusion pulsating throughout their body!

You can’t get as good a reaction from a car even if you rolled up in a fucking Bentley. This three-wheeled half-Camry, this is it. Whatever your questions are, this is the answer.

Godspeed, friend.

UPDATE: It’s a Camry. Not a Corolla, as the ad suggests. A commenter reminded me, but I’m kicking myself because I looked at the front and registered Camry and just went with Corolla, anyway, because, let’s be honest, I was rushing. I have a lot of growing up to do. Also, is this really in Sydney?

(Thanks to our favorite Australian, Laurence, for showing us the light about this!)

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